So I finally felt up to swaping the lock on the front door out for a deadbolt.
Things started badly when I found the last handles were attached with massive holes, but I thought ‘oh, some wood filler and it’ll be a 15 minute job…’
While filling the hole I noticed some metal shards, but just ignored them as an oddity.
An hour later it was all dry and set to chisel, which is when I discovered what the metal shards were… our door is actually reinforced with steel plates!
So there I was with a door with no way forward and no way back…
A 15 minute job quickly turned into 3 hours of swearing.